New Driver

Wow… a month and a half with nothing. So this is what happens when you make a personal vow to blog about bad dates and then suddenly have none. It’s not that I’ve been having no dates. Just no bad dates. Wow… I can’t believe those words were typed on a keyboard anywhere close to me! I’ve actually been going on good dates with a boy. “The boy” as my mom and I have taken to calling him.

A few words about my mom. She knows me. I mean REALLY knows me. It’s creepy sometimes. She just gets me. Gets it. And remembers EVERYTHING (except of course the smattering of childhood memories I swear to have that she claims never actually occurred – hello riding on the fire truck in South Carolina). Anyway… I digress. My mom has learned over the years that she must absolutely not put a label on my love life. Other than labeling me as her eternally single and fabulously independent daughter. Those labels I can handle. The labels about my love life I cannot. Over the years she has graciously adopted my favorite term of “just being.” I can be someone’s friend, I can eventually (a way far off until I feel totally ready to commit to that kind of title eventually) be someone’s girlfriend. The in between period is called “just being.”

Through this most recent “just being” phase I’ve discovered something. The dating game is a lot like learning how to drive. And refresher courses should really be mandatory for those of us who temporarily had our license suspended.

There are signals and signs. Some are mixed and confusing and you always pray “Wrong Way” isn’t referring to the lane you’re driving in. Accelerating and breaking are common. Sometimes it’s only in anticipation and other times it’s in response to your fellow drivers. Either way… whiplash is no fun. I think about some of my friends who were so eager to hit the open road. While I on the other hand, was a little more cautious, thinking how scary it all seemed. I took it nice and slow and avoided the major highways until I felt safe on the backroads. Eventually we all got there, some faster than others. There those “rules” everyone knows to follow that are glaringly obvious like a giant Do Not Enter sign straight ahead. No talk of religion or politics or god forbid ex’s. Remember Do Not Enter is there for a reason. Sometimes if you go down that path you might get stuck. In the end the worst thing that can happen is feeling like you’ve been hit by a Mack truck or have reached a Dead End.

Learning how to drive isn’t all bad though. When you do eventually hit the open-up road it can be really fun. Wind in your hair on a beautiful sunny fall day can’t stop smiling kind of fun. You want to show off your new car to all your friends. And you can finally forget about that old model you thought was great at first but turned out to be a real lemon. It’s a great car for learning but not a keeper.

Just like we learned in driving school… sometimes we stall and just need a battery recharge to remind us how to get going again.