Oh is that a ring your wearing... no you can't have my number

Dear Married Men/Guys With Girlfriends/Fiances or anyone in your life who assumes you are dating them -

Please take notice...

Do not hit on me, flirt, attempt to get my number, give me yours or even look remotely interested in talking to me. If I wanted to meet an a$$ I can do that without hurting someone else too. There are plenty of single jerks lurking around without you taken guys stomping all over their territory.

Believe me, if you stop trying to pick up chik's everyone will appreciate it. Probably your wife/girlfriend/fiance most of all.

You are ruining things for a) me and my single girlfriends who are trying to as hard as we can to not think horrible things about the male race b) your younger and more eligible counterparts who genuinely CAN talk to me in a bar but are scared off by your sleazy butt.

Thanks bunches!

xoxo,
That single girl in the bar you spent all of last Friday night talking to about your wife and 4 kids and then had the audacity to come on to.

p.s. Thanks for picking up our dinner tab! We actually didn't go home "because we are so tired." Really we went to a bar only a few blocks away to escape you and your little sidekick ; )